Browns

16 September 2018

Something odd happened today; I got depressed about the result of an American football game. It’s been years since last that happened, and well before my break for marriage and parenting.

Today, in a game expected to be an easy win for the New Orleans Saints, the Cleveland Browns lost late. Missed kicks, as during last week’s tie, were the key. Just as last week I listened to it on the ‘radio’, well actually from within an app on my iPhone. To add an extra frisson of something akin to desperation, the battery pack decided it wouldn’t charge the phone so I was left scrabbling about in desperation for an iPhone charging…

Yeah, football. I’ve subscribed to the Fark.com news aggregator site for a few years now. Every gameday someone posts a discussion thread spanning a few games and all and sundry weigh in with opinions, live scores and occasionally brilliantly insane analysis. It’s a bit like I’d imagine an NFL subreddit would be but without the ridiculous and often weaponised downvoting.

Anyway, this week I decided for the first time to join the fray during the 4th. Bad mistake. Bad, bad, bad. Every, and I do mean every, time I posted the Browns offensive game turned to shiat. An interception and especially those missed kicks killed us.

‘Us’? Yeah, still feeling a bit of Impostor Syndrome here, but it’ll pass. Perhaps in a few years?

Not telling you what I’m wearing, but it might be different next week.

On a high note, one of at least expectation, the next 5 games should be easier than those first 2. Or, applying conventional wisdom, at least one would expect so.

A prediction then. Scoring ties, losses, wins from right to left, I’m expecting the first 3 weeks to go:

1. 0-0-1
2. 0-1-1
3. 1-1-1

Anything correct past that and I’d get burnt at the stake as a witch.

1. 0-0-1
2. 0-1-1
3. 1-1-1
4. 2-1-1
5. 2-2-1
6. 2-2-2

Yeah, statistically there’s almost zero chance of that second tie, but I can’t decide what to pick based on the play I’m seeing from the teams expected to have it easy both this and last weeks.

No, I haven’t a clue what any of this means.