Boobies

21 September 2016

We’ve all done it; had that momentary lapse of judgment with the inherent possibility of instant doom.

Mine, yesterday, was easy.

Presented, I was, with a chance conversation, within it a single word, and well, sat in front of a computer connected to the Internet the opportunity seemed too good to be true.

So I typed a word into the search engine. The only picture I SAW in the initial results page was a rather odd-looking bird. It’s what I EXPECTED to see, see?

Clicking ‘Images’ brought home to me the inherently unpredictable nature of The Internet. Or maybe my naivete. Not a single feathered bird photo appeared. Not one.

A page of boobies. Luckily my work PC has only a 24 inch monitor. I can’t imagine the effect were it to be splashed across, oh, say a 34 inch wide-screen curved thing of beauty. Thankfully no-one who saw it was offended. And it was off my screen in a flash, and the browser history manually edited. Maybe insufficient for my psychological well-being but it’s done. In my past.

But now I know there’s a log file somewhere with the search result. Maybe 3 ‘somewheres’; maybe Google, maybe my company’s ISP, maybe my company’s data centre. Maybe the NSA, GCHQ too are interested in a part-time idiot’s browsing habits.

Don’t Panic BAZ!